Happy BDay Dean Smith
Dean Smith
(Let me preface this by saying I wrote this as tears filled my eyes and went down my cheek). It was a day like most others when it came to the beginning of my marriage, some good times surrounded by a lot of uncertainties that led to a lot of arguing and even more bad times. Those times didn’t happen because of me or because of the woman I love (and have loved for day one that I met), they happened because there were a lot of things that were still not firm in our life, like how our career paths would be going. What we needed was someone that would give us sound advice, someone that would share something with us to make us understand who we were. Not who and her or her and I were, but who “we” were. That person came along in the the form of Dean Smith, yes, the ex head coach of North Carolina, on the day before his last ever win as a head coach, in Syracuse.
Just like most days this one too wasn’t going too well. My wife didn’t have any purpose in going to see coach Smith. On the other hand I was not going to miss it for the world. Fortunately this time I won out, because what happened next would change not my life, not her life, but our lives forever. We waited by the school’s bus as the coach talked to a couple who had a young child with them. I was amazed at how the coach was so nice to the three of them that it might have been enough, but little did I know! As coach Smith finished talking to the people before us he looked at me and my wife, whose posture definitely showed she didn’t want to be there and gave us that warming smile. One that would melt away anything bad, and I mean anything, as Wendy quickly turned back to her usual great self. As he shook our hand one of his assistant called him to say that the team was ready to practice. He turned around and in his gentle way said “don’t you see I am talking to someone”, paused a second and said “I am sure you guys can start and I will be there in just a bit”.
It stunned me, and to this day my wife tells everyone about that scene. We were both shocked that we almost didn’t know what to say, someone like Dean Smith had put us in front of his team. In the end we didn’t need to say anything, he knew it all. He held both of our hands and said to us: “You have one another and that is a gift no one can ever take away from you”. Then looking at me and her and back at me he concluded “Cherish this gift and cherish one another for the rest of your lives and you will never regret it”. Over a decade, over so many hills to climb and valleys to get out of my wife and I are so much in love because a man who had so many other things on his mind was able to share those two minutes with us and tell us those simple, yet so powerful words. I am blessed to be a Tar Heel, but not for the W/L, not for the national championships, or whatever else, but because of the wonderful and amazing people that the University of North Carolina has produced!
And while you might never know this coach Smith “thank you so much” for what you did and the best of birthdays to you and all the best to you and your family. I have heard so many people say that you have changed their lives, I know you have changed mine and that of my wife. I might forget some of your wins, because I don’t have that great of a memory, but I will never ever forget that two minutes that you shared your life with us. And for as long as I live I will tell that story to as many people are willing to listen! Once again, thank you so much coach Smith and happy birthday to you!
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